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Louisa Catherine Johnson to John Quincy Adams

13 Dec. 1796

London Decbr. 13 1796

Another week is elapsed yet not a line from my friend—Cruel Boreas thus to sport with the feelings of one already so much oppressed—

You will ere this have received my letters, which I am fearful will not contribute to your happiness—I frequently wish I could recall them, then resolve in future to act more deserving of you, but alas my friend your Louisa totally unaccustomed to disguise, finds herself equally inadequate to the task of conquering or concealing her weakness—

I am sure you must think me a very insipid correspondent, or wandering one indeed I am, for my mind is at present in such a state I find it impossible in the smallest degree to connect my ideas, but write I must and flatter myself you will with patience receive them, when I acknowledge that writing to you is the only pleasure I am at present capable of receiving.

There are I find five Mails due, how impatiently do I await there arrival surely some of them will bring treasures for me—

Let me my friend indulge the hope that you will not suffer any oppertunity to escape, indeed to think otherwise would give me infinite pain

With what strength of mind did I apparently sit down to write this letter, yet do I find myself insensibly relaxing into the same strain of unavailing complaint—Forgive me my friend I am ashamed of my folly though incapable of correcting it—

Fearful lest I should again relapse I must hasten to conclude. with the sincerest wishes for your happiness I remain your truely and / Faithfully affectionate

Louisa C. Johnson–

RC (MHi: Adams Papers).
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